Smoking (doping)is an ART.
You all love smoking and passing that blunt, having a good time. But wait, do you cause disaster and trouble? Oh yeah, you do. Not really, but when it comes to people who want you to QUIT SMOKING, you are a sinner!
So, what do they do? They constantly annoy you with every chance they get. From emotional blackmails to threats, long lectures and what not, people around you come up with situations that make you want to teleport away. Sadly, you can’t.
So, here are some tweaked dialogues from Hindi movies which is fit for what smoker and dopers think when approached with a quit smoking banner.
Some dialogues on the other hand really explain (at a deep level) why they can’t quit smoking. When you constantly poke a smoker and he stays mum for a while before coming back at you with whatever reason would make you shut up, this is what happens.
And mind you, this post is (not )to be taken SERIOUSLY. Because really, this is what goes on inside them brains.
Take a look and tell me, do you agree-
1. Because the bond you have with your ciggie
The taste, the kick and the feel of smoking is something only a true smoker would understand. Which is why, when you come blabbering about the side effects of smoking and that it’s destroying your lungs, you just don’t know how to convince them.
This dialogue with a pinch of precise ‘Aamir Khan’s emotional quotient’ truly explains why you can’t quit smoking.
2. Coz you are khatro key Khiladi
This one comes from the attitude bouwyazz!! You are not the kind who gets scared of petty things like lung cancer and bronchitis. You belong to the Spartans race, and heck no. You can’t quit smoking because you don’t want to. Ahoo- ahooo- ahooo!
This dialogue by John seems to pretty much play in your mind when anyone one earth bugs you to quit.
3. Well, that’s the real reason
Ok, put your hands up if you can’t feel alive unless you have unloaded your dump first thing in the morning. I know, for most of you cigarette is a necessity. And this goes on in every smoker’s mind when they say that it’s easy to quit.
Paresh Rawal comes to your rescue in this case because even he knows how important that first-morning ciggie is.
4. The real truth is this though
This one is for those who admire the beauty of cigarettes. The ones who don’t just smoke, but also love SMOKING altogether. For them, girls and latest movies don’t matter, the news doesn’t matter, the earth itself doesn’t matter because they know the truth.
And hey, when Hrithik Roshan said ‘Saadgi’, he meant Malboro(read Maalbharo) lights!
5. The best come back for people you can’t fight with
Some people just never give up. And the sad part is, a few of them happen to be from your friend circle. Mostly they are girls who think that they can make the impossible possible. They just can’t believe that you can’t quit smoking.
And this dialogue from Rangoon exactly explains what’s going on when you don’t want to respond.
6. Coz you are a GUNDA
The dire dialogue that can stop every non-smoking protester. Though, you can only use it your boy’s gang, because #metoo is here. LOL. But yes, this dialogue remains to be the go-to option for every smoker ever, when a GUY non-smoker lectures them about the side effects of smoking.
You can even say it out loud because, they sure as hell deserve it.
7. When the scientist in your brains plans a comeback
I so wanted to use this dialogue on someone but sadly, no one ever dares come up to me. Anyway, this one is my favorite. Next time, when someone fries your brain with why you can’t quit smoking garbage, try this. This will scientifically shut them up.
After all, it really explains the frustration going on in your brain, doesn’t it?
8. You vs your MOM
When your mum says that if you don’t quit, she will die- is when this dialogue itself starts flashing in front of your eye screen, doesn’t it? I mean, you love your mum more than anything in the world, but she shouldn’t say silly things like death and ol, right? That too for a cigarette!
Which is why, when you get stuck in this situation, go for this dialogue.
9. That uncle who smoke beedi but tells you to quit
The annoying uncle from the society wants you to quit smoking but he himself smokes ‘BEEDI’. Like seriously? But yes, this happens and so, when you run into him while getting milk from the store, you don’t want him to begin his quit smoking classes in the middle of the street.
And that’s the dialogue that goes on in your mind. The exact dialogue!
10. That mausaji who is a secret spy
Do you have a relative who knows you smoke and doesn’t lecture you? Instead, he chooses to give you the blankest and deepest stare whenever he stops by. As if planning to attack stealthily. Then there are situations when you want to just grab him and ask him what the fuck is her thinking, but can’t.
It’s that time when you become the pappi jee in your brains and deliver this dialogue to yourself.
11. When you and your smoking is all your family talks about
Here comes the epic dialogue which you can try using, well, everywhere. Especially when it comes to people saying things about your smoking to your parents. Obviously, the neighbor aunty doesn’t have any job but to see when you sneak out for a smoke.
This dialogue is what you tell yourself, when you see people ganging against you.
12. Sati- savitri gf who is after your life
Girls, don’t feel offended. But a guy loves his cigarette as much as (read more) than YOU. So, the next time you are done playing doctor-doctor with your guy, leave him the fuck alone when he is lighting his hit. Don’t lecture him with, ‘why you can’t quit smoking.’
If you do, this dialogue is the auto-generated answer inside his brains. Just so you know.
13. When your dad threatens you he will catch up red-handed
Ok, this one strictly suits the situation when your dad or uncle is arguing that he will catch you red-handed the next time he has doubts about your smoking. Obviously, no one says this dialogue out loud, because of the obvious reasons.
I mean you do want to stay in the house, right? So, just think this one and giggle to yourself.
14. When an aunty marches up to you
Ladies, I know you smoke too. And if an aunty approaches you, take cover in this dialogue. Put on an emotional face and start crying out loud the dialogue from Queen. I bet the aunty will console you and let you smoke alone. Even you can use it guys, works fine too. Just remember to be teary-eyed.
LOL. in case, it doesn’t work let me know because it does for me EVERY SINGLE TIME!
15. For anyone and everyone (whom you can use this on)
I just couldn’t leave Bunty’s famous dialogue out of this. This is actually the first and last response of any smoke when approached with the intent of being lectured. If you smoke, you will die. It’s is not going to harm anyone else BUT YOU.
But they don’t understand that. So, let this dialogue take its toll.